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Why does my cat not sit on my lap?

If your cat does not sit on your lap, this post will show you a number of possible reasons why and what you can do about them.

So, why does my cat not sit on my lap? Likely reasons why your cat does not sit on your lap are that it does not find your lap comfortable, it gets intimidated, it does not like the way you pet it or that it does not want to be bothered.

There are actually a number of possible reasons why your cat does not sit on your lap and it might be due to a combination of reasons. However, there are some things you can consider when figuring out the main cause and there are some things you can do about it.

Reasons why your cat does not sit on your lap

Below are likely causes and what would make them more likely.

It does not find your lap comfortable

It could be the case that your cat does not find it comfortable to sit on your lap. This would be more likely if it does sit next to you and it does not seem to be avoiding you. In this case, it could help to make space for your cat next to you instead.

Nature

It might be the case that your cat is naturally not very intimate. This would be more likely if it has always not wanted to sit on your lap and if it is a cat breed that is known for not being so affectionate.

If you want to get it to be more intimiate you could try rewarding it when it shows signs of being affectionate and to avoid rewarding it when it is not affectionate.

Intimidation

It might also be the case that you have been intimidating it. You might have been intimidating it by approaching it too quickly, being too loud or aggressive around it or because you accidentally hurt it. Instead, it would help to be calm and gentle with it.

It does not like the way you pet it

The cause might also be that your cat does not like the way that you pet it. This would be more likely if your cat does sit on your lap for a while but it stops when you start petting in a certain way. This would be less likely if it does sit next to you and get you to pet it often.

It does not want to be bothered

The cause could also be that your cat does not want to be bothered. This would be more likely if your cat does sit on your lap sometimes but it does not do it when it seems to want to sleep.

Things to consider

Below are some things you can consider to help figure out the main reason why your cat has been doing it.

If your cat did sit on your lap before

If your cat did sit on your lap before, it would help to consider what else happened when your cat first stopped doing it. If it stopped doing it suddenly, it might be the case that there was an event that caused your cat to stop sitting on your lap. It could be due to a change in the way that you interact with it and pet it.

If your cat does sit on your lap sometimes

If your cat does sit on your lap sometimes, it would also help to consider what is different when it does not do it. If it does not do it when it is sleeping, it would be likely that it does not sit on your lap when it wants to sleep. Whereas, if it stops sitting on your lap when you start petting it a certain way, it would be likely that it does not like it when you pet it that way.

It could be showing affection towards you that you are not realizing

It is also important to consider that not sitting on your lap does not mean that your cat does not like you. Cats can show affection in many ways and it might be the case that your cat has been being affectionate but you haven’t been noticing it.

Ways that your cat might actually be showing affection towards you could include:

  • “Nosing” you which is where it touches you with its nose and smells you
  • Putting itself into vulnerable positions when it is around you
  • Licking you
  • Leaning on you
  • Bringing things to you
  • Following you around

What to do about your cat not sitting on your lap

Below are some options you have when dealing with the behavior.

Let your cat sit elsewhere

If it seems to be the case that your cat naturally does not like sitting on your lap, one option would be to give it another spot to sit in that is close to you and to reward your cat when it sits there.

Be calm with it and pet it the way it likes

As mentioned above, it might be the case that there is an issue with the way you have been interacting with it. Instead, it would help to pet it in a way that it seems to like and to be calm around it. Usually, cats prefer to be rubbed below the chin instead of having a full back rub.